Planning the unplannable: Birth plans and their purpose

/ Birth, Natural Parenting, Pregnancy

I so often hear mamas say “there’s no point in making a birth plan….birth is unpredictable.”

Yup! It is. Birth is wild, unpredictable, highly individualized, and different every single time.

And that’s the point of a birth plan.

Confused yet? Let’s talk about it.  

What is a birth plan?

When most people hear “birth plan,” they think of a piece of paper that is handed to their provider near the end of pregnancy dictating how they expect their birth to go.  

While this is the case for some people, that’s not the whole story.  

Yes, at face value, a birth plan is a culmination of how you would ideally like to see your birth play out.  But more than that, a birth plan is a way for you to have conversations with your provider about your birth wants and needs.  

Even more than that, it’s a medium for you to learn all your options and make the best possible decisions for you and your baby throughout your pregnancy, birth, and postpartum.

What should be included in a birth plan?

There are countless sample birth plan templates online that walk through labor preferences and goals. But so often, these can feel limiting or restrictive. 

“Do you want intervention A or intervention B?” as though you have to choose between those two options only.  “When you arrive at the hospital….” as though it’s the only place to birth. “I will get my epidural when…” as though you can’t birth without it.  

Your birth plan should leave you feeling empowered and prepared, not reluctantly accepting a false arbitrary choice of predestined options.  Because at the end of the day, literally every. single. moment. is a choice! 

There is nothing you “have” to do. Even in life and death moments, we make a choice. 

So what’s included in a birth plan? That’s entirely your choice! Typically, it includes your choices about common interventions that happen during labor and immediately postpartum.

Often included are things like ambiance in the room (think through your senses), desires for interventions (induction methods, pain management, etc.), choices for pushing (position, assistance, etc.), and immediate postpartum wishes.  

Things that are often overlooked are the what ifs.  More often than not, mamas include what they want or don’t want.  

It’s important to think through your ideal birth, but also think through what happens when things go off course.  What do you do then? 

Other things to think through that deserve their own planning are care for older kiddos and postpartum planning beyond the immediate aftermath of birth.

What SHOULDN'T be included in a birth plan?

If you intend to hand your provider a piece of paper detailing your birth intentions, try to make it easy to read and consume.  Especially if you’re birthing in a hospital, they will not take the time to read through paragraphs and pages of a plan.

 

Make it concise, and your “no” choices are likely more important to highlight than your “yes.”

The bottom line

Remember that we cannot plan birth. Birth is the most predictable unpredictable event you’ll ever experience. And it’s something that will stay with you for the rest of your life.  

We can plan for birth, but we cannot plan birth. Learn your options, set intentions, hold with a loose hand, and surround yourself with a team that supports your goals; this is what will set you up for success!

If you want help building a birth plan or want to talk through one you’ve already made, it’s definitely something we can cover in a one-on-one coaching call!  Another great option to check out is my friend Nicole’s awesome Birth Plan Bootcamp that can help get you in the right mental space before embarking on the needed research and soul-searching of writing a birth plan.

And while we’re at it, here’s a starter list (aka this is not all of it!!!!) of things to consider and research when you start to think about your birth: